Wednesday, 23 April 2014

Are Women Really Gullible?

 Most times when I sit with guys to gist, it baffles me how much they think we women are gullible and easy to influence. I usually find myself arguing on behalf of all women, most times to no avail. Once guys believe a thing, it’s always really difficult to change their minds…lol

I’ve always been on the defensive until recently a kid sister came to my house to share a story of what happened to one of her school mates with me. This made me wonder again and ask myself this question; “Are women really gullible?” I know you are itching to read the story so here it is……..

Shade is a 3rd year student of one of the Nigerian Universities who recently broke up with her boyfriend. They dated for about 3 years before calling it quits. Shade loved this ex- boyfriend so much but since he felt they weren’t good enough for each other, they had to end the relationship so as not to waste each other’s time. This broke her heart and made her withdraw into her shell. Her friends and everyone around her tried consoling her and advised her to move on with her life, after all, a break up wasn’t the end of the world!

Few months later, Shade decided to listen to the numerous advice she got from different sources and move on with her life. As fate would have it, she came across a guy on Facebook. He looked so handsome and knew how to keep in touch regularly. As time went by, they both exchanged numbers and started talking regularly over the phone too. Shade found herself growing fond of this new guy; Yemi, therefore had to succumb when he suggested they see face to face.
They both agreed that they meet and since the guy was based in Port Harcourt (like he claimed), he decided to come down to Ogun State (where Shade’s school is) to meet with her. Shade was so happy Yemi was eventually coming to see her. She rearranged her room, changed her hairdo and made sure everything was in order.

The day Yemi arrived; Shade went to meet him at the car park. The first thing that caught her attention was that he wasn’t too well dressed as she expected. He was too casually dressed for her liking. Yemi on the other hand seemed so happy to see her and gave her a warm hug. He asked for the closest hotel around so he could lodge but Shade declined saying her room was cozy enough. Yemi didn’t argue, therefore they both went straight to Shade’s room.

She prepared some food for him which he ate and they both started talking. Yemi told her how wealthy his parents are and that he came down to see her simply because he really wanted to settle down as soon as possible. He claimed she was the exact type of girl he dreamt of and that he was willing to take her home to mama. He told her so many sweet things like how beautiful and intelligent she was, how much he loved her and can’t do without her and how much he would like to spend the rest of his life with her. These were soothing words to Shade as her last breakup hurt her terribly. These promising words made her bring down her guard and she totally gave in to all of Yemi’s demands overnight (by this I mean sexual demands).

The following morning, after their long night together, Shade woke up to tell him that there wasn’t enough foodstuffs in her room and that she had to go buy some. Yemi told her calmly that he had no cash on him but that he would like to give her a cheque so that she can cash it for food stuffs, her toiletries and some extra for her pocket money. He wrote her the cheque and she left for one of the school banks.

After getting to the bank, Shade was told she had to return the cheque to the account owner that the signature on it was irregular. She went out of the bank premises frustrated and with the intention of giving Yemi a call, but his number was no longer going through. She then left the bank in annoyance and headed for her hostel.

On getting to her room, she realized Yemi was nowhere to be found, she called him severally also but his number just wasn’t going through. That was when she began to suspect something was amiss. She went into her wardrobe to check if the only valuables she had; her laptop and ipad were still there but she met an empty space. She broke down in tears as reality of the situation eventually dawned on her. She had been played for a fool!!! My kid sister told me her friend shared this story with her amidst tears and she was inconsolable. Is she actually unlucky or gullible?
This is the story that made me reconsider if women are really gullible and I have reached some conclusions (which took me a long time to) which I am willing to share today.

The way God created women, we are moved by what we hear and feel. Just the right words from a man can make a woman dance perfectly to his tunes. While some of us can sit down and rethink issues or situations we find ourselves in,  before taking any actions, some are very quick in playing along without actually thinking deeply and weighing the options they have.

I know myself as a very cautious person but sometimes I almost give in to things before actually thinking them through. Women are like that. It is only the very strong ones among us that can really decide what we want without any undue influence.
If I’m gonna be very true, Shade was a little bit too fast in giving in to Yemi. I am not really a good judge in this case because I don’t know Shade one on one and I don’t have the full details of what she went through before meeting Yemi,  neither do I know the type of upbringing she had or her personal beliefs.
Judging anyway from this story, I would out rightly say; “yes, some women are really gullible” or what do you guys think?

Firstly, because she met him on-line, she wasn’t supposed to invite him into her room in the first place. He came down from Port Harcourt therefore; he should be prepared to pay for a hotel room.

Secondly, she shouldn’t have slept with him for any reason. No matter how sweet tongued he was, she shouldn’t have believed him enough to pull her pants down for him. That was the first time she was meeting him face to face for crying out loud! If he actually wanted to take her home to mama like he claimed then he would have been patient enough to get to know her better too.

Thirdly, she shouldn’t have met him alone after all she had friends she would have guarded herself with. If she had done that, there wouldn’t have been room for him to start telling her all the sweet lies that eventually made her give in.

Also, I think under no circumstances should she have left him alone in her room where she had some valuables. She didn’t know this guy from Adam, therefore shouldn’t have taken any chances.

Lastly, meeting someone online doesn’t mean you actually know that person. Online relationships are always surreal. The two parties can create the images they want each other to see of them and these images are often times fake. He may claim to be whoever he is not online because you are not with him to verify if it’s actually true. Ladies especially need to be very careful.

Based on all these, I believe some women are gullible but I still stand firmly on my initial opinion because I believe there are still the straight-thinking ones who are very good at making their own decisions without being influenced by anyone.

In other words, my conclusion is that; not all women are gullible or what do you readers think? Your opinions and comments are totally welcome!
Thanks y’all for your time. *hugs*

Bukola Oyetunji


Anonymous said...

I feel sorry for the girl

modupe said...

Yes I can say dat most women are gullible cos we moved by wht we hear.