Tuesday, 23 February 2016

How to Find your Soulmate ASAP!

                                                      I’m tall, dark and handsomely rich!

Yet my girl is beyond my reach,

God’s time is the best I hear my friends preach,

Yet I know time is the greatest breach,

Need someone to call my own,

A person that understands my tone,

Share my bed and build my home,

                                                             Where could she be?      

Open my eyes and let me see

I’m tired of waiting without glee

And now my question is……………………

Will I ever find love?

Who says waiting to meet the right person is an easy task? So many mature singles out there are totally fed up of waiting endlessly for the right one to come along. While some wait patiently and pray fervently, others employ ungodly and immoral measures in order to change their status from single to married.

I want to state categorically that finding your love or someone to love you in return is different from getting someone to propose to or a man to propose to you. I’ve seen some marriages that are not built on love but on desperation to get married and escape the scrutiny of the family, happiness is by all means far from such marriages.

Before you think of getting married, you have to search yourself deeply and see if you are in love with that person. Love is the principal thing. It secures every relationship. It keeps the man and woman in track when everything else fades away.

I tell most mature singles who want to settle down in marriage to confirm that true love has bloomed (and keeps blooming) in their relationship before consummating the relationship in marriage. You must be sure beyond all reasonable doubt that the man or woman loves you unconditionally. He/she should be ready to do everything to have you in his/her life.

I’m not saying love is easy to come by, rather, I’m emphasizing that in finding your partner, you must find love. Love guarantees a happy life in marriage. You don’t need just a partner to marry; you need someone to love you and marry you as if his/her life depends on it.

I remember when I met my husband. I knew instantly that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I fell in love with him unconditionally (actually, I grew in love with him) because I knew he was the one for me. That love made him the right person for me which eventually became the foundation we built our love upon.

To find love you need to make yourself lovable. A wise king once said “A man with friends is to show himself friendly”. You need to look approachable. Don’t look like the load of this world is upon your shoulders. Free your mind and believe that the one for you will surely come.

Are you a man? Then please, do not hastily generalize that all the ladies out there are after your money; there are so many who are seriously in search of genuine love.

Not quite long ago, I had a chat with a single guy who appeared to be seriously in search of a lady to spend the rest of his life with. During our conversation, he made me understand that all the single ladies out there are after money. He was of the opinion that they all need a man to milk dry. I tried changing his mind by telling him that there are still the good ones who are in search of love and someone to give them happiness, but sadly, all to no avail.

Are you a lady? To find love you need to be less materialistic. You also need to know that there is no perfect man out there. Everyone has flaws, you only need to understand and learn to accept him. Do not build an unrealistic image of an ideal man in your head. The tall, dark and handsome man is the dream of every woman but the short and less handsome ones are getting married everyday, too.

Don’t give yourself a target that you won’t be able to meet in a long time to come. Learn to open your mind and let love come unconditionally. It would happen before you even know it is love.

Back to the gentlemen . . .

Learn to see that to earn the love of a woman you also need to love her in return. A woman loves being pampered—being spoilt. She loves attention. Make her feel special, take her out, let her feel free whenever she’s with you . . . She will definitely love you.  You need to understand that women, by nature, often have mood swings; it’s natural! Respect the friends you see around her and she would love you back. Most importantly, you need to treat her like a queen and make her realize how much you love her every now and then. Once she falls in love with you, you have the key to her heart. Don’t conclude within you that she’s after your money. Erase that mindset and see if she would not worship the ground on which you walk!

I personally believe that finding love is very important in life therefore we all need to play our roles. And please, after you eventually find this love you crave for; learn to nurture it every day so that it won’t get malnourished, lest it dies!
Wish you all the best!
Bukola Oyetunji

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