Dear Bukola,I run a very successful accounting firm in the northern part of the country. About 8 months ago a beautiful and sophisticated lady was employed and the moment I laid my eyes on her, I knew I had to date her. Right from the second week she joined us, I started an affair with her and just last month I rented a luxurious apartment for her. Sex with her is like heaven to me, I have never experienced such before, not even with my wife. Unfortunately, my wife got to hear about this and she has since tried everything in her power to end the relationship but I won’t have it. I can’t say I love this employee of mine but the sex is too good for me to let go of her. The only thing that pains me is that my wife doesn’t understand, instead she gets more unhappy every day. Do you think there is anything I can do?
Dear Boss,Your mail is one of the most interesting ones I ever got because I had to read it over and over again in order to understand exactly what is going on with you. There are a lot of unanswered questions which I wish you had given so as to make me know where exactly you are coming from and what you are driving at. Notwithstanding, if you are a frequent reader of my blog and column (Dear Bukola - published every Saturday in Saturday Mirror ) you would understand that in as much as I try to be objective, there are some situations I can’t help but be very frank and realistic… your case is one of such. Firstly, I personally respect men that know how to separate business from pleasure; it is obvious you are not one. Secondly, I have more regard for men who value their marriage and who can’t compromise their wife’s happiness for anything in the world, it is also obvious you are not that type of man. Thirdly, I respect a man who after hurting his wife would let go of everything, be remorseful and try to make amends but obviously you are also not this type of man. Hence, it goes without saying that you need to do some personal evaluations. Do you really think your wife would know of your extramarital affairs and be happy with you? There is no woman out there that can be happy when she knows her husband is spending his time and money on another woman so don’t expect your wife to be. It is obvious the sex you are getting from this employee has taken over your mind but you have to be careful so that it won’t lead you to an early grave. I don’t want to be judgmental but your mail makes it obvious you no longer care about anything but enjoying sexual escapades with this employee turned ‘mistress’ of yours so I wonder if anything I write here can have effect on you. An important thing I want you to know however is that it won’t last forever. If you cling to her like your life wire today, tomorrow she may get tired of you and discard you like a rag…. Take note of that! The sincere advice I have for you is to retrace your steps back to your wife, it doesn’t have to be about sex. She has been there for you and she will still be there for you provided you change your ways.... Ask God to forgive you so that your life after death would not be full of regrets. Lastly, think of what you want for your future…. Happiness and peace of mind is far greater than sex and believe me, it lasts longer than the few minutes of pleasure that sex has to give.